 |
| |
| |
| | |
JUNE 2023
✨ shiny happy people* |
| | | |
| | |
| Maybe you've heard of it by now? Maybe you've already watched it. Maybe you think it's going to be too activating and want nothing to do with it. Or maybe you just don't have Amazon Prime or an account to borrow and watch.
I recently finished the 4-episode documentary and found myself simultaneously angered by those who use and abuse their positions of power to harm those under their influence, and in awe of those who stepped forward to share their stories.
In case you haven't heard, it shares the story of the Institute for Basic Life Principles (IBLP) as told through the lens of abuse survivors and others who have left IBLP. Following the Duggar family (of “19 Kids and Counting” fame), it describes Bill Gothard’s rise to power and fame, follows the draw of thousands toward a seemingly moral message, and how the Duggars came to represent the ideal family under the IBLP doctrines.
It also uncovers the absolute abuses of power within IBLP and how they groomed families to perpetuate systems of abuse in their own homes. Like so many similar stories of abuse, we see how these systems of power and control continue to create wakes of destruction behind them.
Two quotes stopped me in the final episode: |
| | | |
| | |
“When I testified in court in front of him, I locked eyes with Bill. I had taken my power back. I had taken my voice back. After a full day of testimony, the judge denied Gotthard’s sanctions. He found our testimony to be credible, and we got to walk out of that courtroom victorious.”
-Emily Anderson
“We had this power the entire time over the people who were hurting us. It turns out as much as they tried to control us, we were ultimately what they most feared, and all we had to do was talk.”
-Chad Harris |
| | | |
| | |
| For Emily, who had been groomed and brought up to just take whatever she was subjected to and to submit to any man in authority over her (to the point of all manner of emotional, spiritual, and sexual abuse), what freed her was finding her voice.
For Chad, he realized the power that he and the other survivors of IBLP had over Bill and others in leadership simply by talking about it.
In the end, they both discovered a path toward healing and wholeness by using their voice to speak up.
Don't get me wrong, it absolutely cost them. They share transparently and vulnerably the cost of appearing on the documentary, and the sacrifices of relationships and community they (and many others) made by deciding to share their stories. But having weighed the cost and suffering under the weight of their own silence for so long, they stepped out and courageously spoke.
The wrote online, made reels and posted TikToks, uploaded videos to YouTube, and found any way to share their experience.
If you've experienced spiritual abuse, finding your voice and agency is a major step toward healing. Being able to share your story in the presence of compassionate and attuned witnesses is another.
My deep hope is that together, we'll each find a way to give voice to our own stories some day. To discover and take hold of our own agency. To feel empowered to speak and share. And ultimately, to find healing and wholeness.
I want to leave you with a blessing for those who have experienced spiritual abuse:
may you learn to name your experience
and rediscover agency;
may you vindicate your voice
and be met with those
willing to listen and believe.
may the truth loosen
the grip of your abusers,
reclaim your story,
and replace it
with blessing and belovedness. |
| | | |
| | |
what's next
💬 Continued Conversations: JUNE
This month, we'll be talking with Dr. Janyne McConnaughey, author of the award-winning Trauma In the Pews on Friday, June 30 at 1:30p EDT / 12:30p CDT. We'll talk about how the lack of understanding of healing trauma is trapping people in their trauma and how religious trauma complicates healing.
If you join us, you'll have the chance to interact and ask your questions live! If you can't make it, you can still send me your questions for her and (hopefully) hear the answer on the recording! Just hit reply and send me your questions.
- 🔗 the Zoom link to join the conversation
- 🙋 your chance to interact with our guests live
- 💻 access to the recording and transcript after it’s over
💵 Registration is $10. If you can’t afford it, pay nothing! If you can afford more, help offset the costs for others who can’t. I want to make this as accessible as possible for anyone who wants to attend.
If there's anyone you're interested in hearing from, let me know and I'll see what I can do to get them on the calendar.
👋 New Membership Community Coming Soon!
I'm working hard on a new membership community, and I'd love for you to join me there! The Community will include monthly teachings, virtual community gatherings, prompts and challenges, and most of all, a safe place for our community to gather and interact online. It won't be on Facebook or Instagram, so there's no social media feed to get distracted by, or need to have an account somewhere else to take part.
If you're interested in joining, I'd love to hear from you! Just hit reply and let me hear about what you're looking for or any questions you might have.
|
| | | |
| | |
Toward healing and wholeness, |
| | | |
| | |
| *see the original Instagram post here
Feel free to forward this to a friend who you think would love the conversations and resources!
And if you're that new friend, click here to subscribe so you never miss out on the fun! |
| | | |
|
